So a thirty-something douchebag tries to meet up with a 14 year old girl he met on the interweb, and he shows wearing a "World's Greatest Dad" t-shirt. Priceless.

We have a new definition of abortion, brought to us by ol' Bush himself: “any of the various procedures — including the prescription, dispensing and administration of any drug or the performance of any procedure or any other action — that results in the termination of the life of a human being in utero between conception and natural birth, whether before or after implantation.” (emphasis mine) The pill prevents implantation. So now I am taking abortifacients each time I take a birth-control pill? This is one hell of a slippery slope, friends. Add to that the fact that any entity receiving federal funds is not allowed to discriminate against (read: discipline, fire, etc.) any employee who is opposed to birth control, abortion, or women's general well-being. I'll be so glad when this poophead is out of office.

Worst headline ever: From Fistula to Fab! (and no, it's not a joke) First, do you know what a fistula is? Yeah, makes me cringe just thinking about it. The text reads:

"Lovinsa, mother of two, is recovering from surgery to correct the vasco-vaginal fistula (VVF) that she endured for over ten years. Though she has borne five children, three died at birth because of the fistula. She has been deserted by her husband and is raising her children alone. Lacking self esteem because of what she has had to go through, African Woman decided to lift her spirits. And makeover they did...who knew that behind the facade of a she and depressed young woman was a hot and sexy babe just waiting to get out? Look out world, Lovinsa has arrived!"

Sarah Illenberger makes wonderful organs. Here, have a heart.

Second worst headline: "80 year-old Vegas stripper still does it 'classy'"