This weekend I was able to spend time with J, one of my best friends ever. We're quasi-related (my uncle won't make an honest woman out of her mom) and former roommates, so I kind of consider her a sister. Anyway, we went to the farmer's market on Saturday (a thousand noms, and one of the most influential teachers I had in high school has a booth there!) and then we spent Sunday finalizing an outfit for an upcoming interview on Friday (hers, not mine, and the job is PERFECT for her.) On Saturday she had gone with another friend and tried on an insane number of ill-fitting power suits, cursing the fact that she's one size on the top and another size on the bottom. Basically, buying off-the-rack she could have insanely tight pants and a nicely-fitting jacket, or perfect pants and a jacket that made her look like a little kid playing dress-up. On the other end of the spectrum, one store tried to put her in a short-sleeved/cap-sleeved/sleeveless suit. For an interview! Luckily, she had another friend with her who made her opinion abundantly clear to the salesperson: we don't need trendy, kthanxbai. But Ann Taylor (as always!) came to the rescue. She found a dress and jacket that don't come as a set, and I think she struck the perfect balance between appropriate attire and showing a bit ofher unique personality. Thus, I give you The JH Interview Ensemble:










And she hasn't chosen her shoes yet, but basic black pumps should do the trick. [and i swear that I am a complete tool then it comes to posting pictures. I apologize for the utter wonkiness.)

In other news, Midget 2.0 has officially become a biter. Against all better judgement he bit his sister this weekend, ON PURPOSE and VERY HARD. I'm surprised, frankly, that she didn't whack him upside the head. But there were tears all around, of course from LPT, but also from M2.0 as soon as he realized he was in T-R-O-U-B-L-E. I can't wait for preschool, when I'll get concerned phone calls nightly from parents, wondering why their Little Precious has been rendered nothing more than a teether for M2.0's purposes.

So one of the significant drawbacks (or benefits? or maybe just facts?) of working for your stepfather while having your mother provide childcare at their home is that when something unexpected comes up (like, say, your 24 year old stepbrother is ill and decides he wants to be with his father, thus rendering the aforementioned residence off-limits to ankle-biters) you have to bring one or both of the midgets into the office with you. Now, in the past, this hasn't been a big deal at all. Lil' Puddin' Tater has lots of "work" to do, and now that she can write and is learning to read, I can give her endless activities to accomplish while I do actual work and speak to actual clients. And for an idyllic, halcyon (my word of the day calendar pays off! finally!) time, Midget 2.0 could come into the office and it was truly like he wasn't even there. But, friends, that time is OVER. He's able to ambulate, get in to all sorts of trouble with seemingly innoculous objects, and yell REALLY LOUD. And he refuses to sleep. I kind of understand, because, hey, if people you like are doing potentially cool stuff, you don't want to sleep through it! You want to be in the middle! Helping!

All of this is made worse when I have to bring M2.0 in unexpectedly. Like this morning - I'm unshowered, I overslept, and my clothes need to be washed again. I feel like ass and someone turned off the a/c in my office overnight so it's humid and hot as hell in here. M2.0 refuses to drink his cow juice or sleep and is now in the boss's office and from what I can hear, he's attenpting to make phone calls while taking the heater/air conditioning unit apart, singlehandedly.

I feel like M2.0 will associate this office with an utterly bitchy version of his mother, since I'm constantly trying to keep him quiet, away from office supplies, and out of the boss's office if there's a phone call.

and I missed my coffee.

Completely wonderful filing kit from the Office of the Tooth Fairy. Apparently, these "Official Certificates of Record have increased speed and efficiency of [their] filing capabilities by 47%." Good to know that they're trying to keep costs down.

Via Poppytalk (coolest blog ever): three FREE giftwrap designs. Generosity is a fabulous thing. [And you should also check out Poppytalk Handmade, the main website, for all sorts of spiffy finds.]

30 Rock is completely ripping off The Muppet Show. Thank you, Brian Lynch.

It's dark outside today, at 10 in the morning, which gives the distinct feeling that I should not be at work, that I'm actually supposed to be elsewhere, like cooking dinner or giving the ankle-biters a bath. Speaking of cooking, last night we had a couple of friends over (D&S) and we really "put on the dog" - we had pork tenderloin and the best mashed potatoes ever (I can say that because it's not my recipe at all) and green beans, then for dessert we had Boston Cream Pie. NOMS. It's funny; when we have people over, cooking is no big thing. We do it, it usually tastes pretty good, and we clean up after. When it's just us, dinner consists of M2.0 eating some of whatever I'm having (usually cereal), LPT eats a sandwich if I can talk her into it, and D winds up making something completely gross, like hotdogs with cheese in them.

oh. my. gosh. Have you ever had one of those days when you wake up, are feeling really productive, but then hit a wall around lunchtime? (Maybe I need some Emerald Nuts...) Oy. I've had to be very conscious of the weight of my head, because it keeps gravitating to my desk. It's the kind of sleepy where if you can just close your eyes for five minutes, everything will be fine. Then you wake up two hours later, confused and probably with drool all over your cheek.

Tomorrow I'm going with the ladyfriends to try on bridesmaid dresses for A's wedding. But I'll have to make my undergarment choices carefully. I'll have to wear Spanx (naturally) and possibly wrap myself head-to toe in spandex/lycra, to create a more smooth base so that all the taffeta, tulle, satin and organza will lay more nicely and not cling to every bulge and dimple. Oy again. But, at least I'll have my support group with me, and I am completely confident that no one will let me purchase something atrocious. Right, ladies?

Had a most uncomfortable lunch today with Mother regarding religion and Lil' Puddin' Tater. I'll spare you all the gory details, but the conversation did involve phrases like, "She's my daughter. I will raise her as I see fit," "I know you think you're right, but you're so wrong," and "You're doing Lil' Puddin' Tater a disservice by not embracing this." Yeah. It was unpleasant, but I think the she got the message, and now we'll just have to slink into our respective corners and lick our wounds for a day or so. I won't lie, many things that were said stung a bit.

The new iPhone update comes out on the 17th. I am counting the minutes.

I have to say that I am quite irritated with myself for not updating this blog a bit more regularly. So, henceforth, I WILL UPDATE DAILY. I can't promise that the posts will be fantastic, or even worthy of mention, but they will be.

First up: I am sick of sippy cups. (see? I warned you...) I will be SO FLIPPIN' GLAD when Midget 2.0 is finished with them. I daresay that I would take a lifetime of bottles to sippy cups. The thing is, sippy cups (the ones that don't leak all over everything, that is) have these little valves. They're clear, with intricate little tubes etc. and they don't come apart. They get lost in the dishwasher (where do they go? no clue. probably off gallavanting with all missing socks) and if you leave a sippy cup in the car, under the seat, with juice in it for two weeks (ahem. it happens.), the valves are impossible to ever get clean again. I'm sick of them and I'll be ecstatic when they're gone for good.

Number two: I have a new car! And it's SO PRETTY. And I would advise everyone to purchase this car, because it is SO MUCH FUN to drive. Along with being fun, it's a blast to drive. And I've found that if I turn the music up really loud, I can almost forget that there are two kids in the backseat. Can your car do that? I though not. (I have the 5-speed manual sport version, which increases the fun factor threefold.)

Pet peeve of the day: Why the hell do they make unlined white linen pants at all? I got a pair at Target (very cute, cloth covered buttons and a drawstring) and when I wear them, I have to put more thought and consideration into my undergarments that into any other element of my outfit. No me gusta.

Jim is the cutest thing ever. That is all. (yeah, that one clip isn't of Jim, so I guess what I meant to say was "John Krasinski is the cutest thing ever." My bad.)